Crewe v County
Please don’t be called off
Friday 20 January 2023
I’ve seen us lose 5-0 at Morecambe, 6-0 at Macclesfield, 7-0 at Grimsby - I’m amazed there wasn’t an 8-0 during the dark days in the Conference North - but if I had to sit down and put pen to paper on my worst ever County game, the day we lost our Football League place at Crewe would be a strong contender. Don’t worry, I’m not going to darken the mood ahead of tomorrow, as we could be in the play-offs by 5pm, but I really do hope we do a number on these.
There’s not long to go until ‘A Curry with Colin Woodthorpe’ - our first live event of 2023. It’s taking place at Last Monsoon in Stockport on Monday 30 January at 7.30pm. Come and join us for an entertaining evening with one of Gary Megson’s first County signings ahead of our first season in Division One in 1997-98. Colin’s an absolutely lovely bloke, and having made 171 appearances for County, he’s got some fantastic stories from his five years at Edgeley Park.
You’ll also get poppadoms, mixed starters, curry, rice and naan breads. As well as a full colour souvenir programme. All for just £20. Fancy it? Send me a text or give me a call on 07816 111150, or you can email desmondhinks@hotmail.co.uk
Finally, today’s edition is sponsored by STUDIO26 Haircare. A big thank you to Aaron and the rest of the team in Hazel Grove. County season ticket holders can get a 20% discount at STUDIO26 Haircare throughout January.
Des Junior
Des Junior loves writing about County. But he can never be arsed doing match previews. They’re a bit dull, aren’t they? Paddy Madden’s out for two games with an ingrown toenail…blah blah blah…tomorrow’s referee has handed out more cards than Moonpig…blah blah blah…County haven’t won at Birmingham since 1672.
Fortunately, he has a number of fellow County content providers to call upon. Here’s their thoughts as we head back to Gresty Road for the first time since 2011, when our relegation to the Conference was confirmed mathematically. Let’s hope tomorrow is cathartic.
Jon Keighren, Stockport County
Crewe were absolutely abysmal on Boxing Day. Can you see anything other than an away win tomorrow?
Crewe have started 2023 well. They’re unbeaten in three, and they’ve added a new striker to address their goal scoring dilemma, as well as a couple of loans from the Premier League. We can’t take anything for granted, but we’ve got momentum, a genius for a manager, and we have players in form, so County will inevitably be strong favourites. However, I’m expecting Crewe to be a lot, lot better than they were last month.
Nick Lee, The Scarf Bergara Wore
We’ve got two full sides at Gresty Road. This is gonna be ace, innit?
It is gonna be ace, that’s if it’s on! The selfish part of me wants it to be off as I can’t make it anyway, so hopefully the rearranged fixture would fit better for me. However, it’d be nice to keep our rediscovered momentum going, so fingers crossed the weather takes a turn for the better. Otherwise, they’ll have to get Dario’s collection of pinball machines plugged in on the pitch - that should generate enough heat to thaw it out.
Ian Brown, hedgegrower
What’s your best and worst memories from past games against Crewe?
Best was probably the 3-0 win in 2008 which saw County dawdling along at 0-0 at half-time but storm through after the break to run away with a 3-0 win - particularly memorable for me for the relatively rare occurrence of a goal by a player much maligned, but highly regarded by me, Peter Thompson.
As for the worst, back in March 2003, County went to Gresty Road with a team laced with exciting names: Luke Beckett, Aaron Wilbraham, Rickie Lambert (played as a midfielder of course), oh… and Challinor, so I was thinking a win was not impossible. We lost 1-0, though, and the goal came from the incredibly irritating Rodney Jack late on to rub salt in the wounds.
Back to Saturday, I cannot see us losing this one. Challinor has a relatively simple team selection task. For me he should start with keeping Hippolyte, Collar and the essential Croasdale in place in midfield, play Knoyle and Rydel as wing-backs, Madden and Wootton up front, with a back three of Wright, Byrne and Ryan Johnson in front of the irreplaceable Hinchliffe and we are quids in!
Jonathan Baker aka Geordie Hatter, The County Away Day Show
As we’re playing the trainspotters tomorrow, what’s your top five songs for a train journey?
1) ‘Waiting for the Ghost Train’ - Madness
A later single from Camden's finest seven-piece. Apparently it's an anti-apartheid lyric, which passed me by at the time because I was mostly admiring how they'd melded the 'chuff-chuffing' sounds of a steam engine into the jaunty melody, without making the whole affair overly corny. That's easier said than done. They were/are such masters of their craft, those lads.
2) ‘Train from Kansas City’ - Shop Assistants
Probably one of many songs about love affairs starting, or as in this case, ending, in railway stations. The Shop Assistants seem to be largely forgotten about now, like an abandoned lover, which I think is a shame. Loved their wall of sound take on shoegazing janglepop. And really fancied the lead singer. Unlike, say, Madonna, you could imagine meeting her in a smoky students union disco and sharing a can of Red Stripe with her. Sadly, this never occurred.
3) ‘Euston’ - The Smiths
Such an evocative lyric from Stretford's finest, and every time I hear it I worry afresh for young Stephen's fortunes, arriving in the Big Smoke from the far northern provincial reaches with nothing but a suitcase and a sprig of gladioli to his name. I think it turned out OK.
4) ‘Nothing Ever Happens’ - Even As We Speak
Possibly the most-perfect-ever one minute and 45 seconds of lovelorn indie pop to be set on a deserted railway platform and sung in an Australian accent. (As in, the band were from Australia; I'm not suggesting they were putting it on. That would be reprehensible and unnecessary.)
5) ‘Up the Junction’ - Squeeze
Only tangentially/suggestively train-related, but makes the cut on account of being one of the most beautiful and heartlifting and heartbreaking pop songs ever recorded. I'm usually in tears by the end. So perhaps not so advisable to listen to in a crowded Crewe-bound carriage after all!
As for the game, we beat them 2-0 just the other week, and I can see no reason why the return journey shouldn't run to the same advertised timetable, unless the players all go on strike (and as they are clearly providing an essential public service, the Tories will probably have outlawed that by Saturday anyway. We would be obliged by statute to run a skeleton service, perhaps fielding just the goalkeeper and centre-forward). 2-0 County.
💇♂️ Receive 20% off your haircut at STUDIO26 Haircare
A new year, a new you! OK, your resolution to get fit in 2023 has probably already gone out of the window, with a Domino’s on the way to soak up the Christmas and New Year’s Eve booze. But one thing you can do to turn a few more heads is get a smart new haircut. There’s only one place to go - STUDIO26 Haircare in Hazel Grove. Aaron and the team provide high-class barbering services in a hygienic, positive and client-friendly environment. You’ll be well looked after, and if you’re a County season ticket holder, take it with you to receive a 20% discount in January.
Today in SK
🎶 If you fancy dancing your Friday night away, DJ Gareth Brooks is on at Bask from 7pm till 2am.
Two stands packed with a noisy, expectant Stopfordian crowd, the players thinking they are at home due to the racket booming from both angles, the score will be 0-3 and the trains will be crammed with giddy, chanting drunkards heading back to Stockport discussing whether it’s the playoffs or automatic promotion that’s our realistic prize come May Bank holiday.