“I’m nicking you for being a smart arse then”
Vicar, from Yellowboard, recalls an eventful trip to Newport in 1976
Friday 9 December 2022
Dear County fans, Stopfordians, other football supporters, and anyone else joining us today, a very warm welcome to your Friday edition of The Scarf My Father Wore. I usually do the match preview on a Friday, but apparently Rochdale’s pitch is already frozen solid, so I’ll leave that for now. Instead, I’ve got a fantastic piece for you to enjoy today, courtesy of Vicar off Yellowboard, who reminisces about a lively trip to Newport back in August 1976.
Congratulations to Oliver Reeves, the latest winner in our December prize giveaway. Oliver’s won four County coasters, courtesy of Glove and Whistle. We’ve got loads more prizes to give away today, which we’ll do at half-time in both World Cup games.
To give all subscribers a fair chance, each winner will be chosen by a random number generator, which you can watch live on Twitter (@countyscarf).
Finally, today’s edition is sponsored by The Site Supply Company. A big thank you to Steve Cree. Check out hivis.net if you need any workwear or high visibility clothing, and get 10% off all orders with the code TSMFW.
Des Junior
I recently posted about a trip to Newport on Yellowboard and Des asked me to provide a more detailed account of the events of that boiling hot August day in 1976.
The summer of 1976 was one of the hottest on record, it just seemed to go on and on. It had gone way beyond hosepipe bans; we actually had water rationing. The water was turned off at 7pm, so people would be filling buckets and kettles just before it went off.
The day of our trip to Newport was another scorcher. As we often did around this time, about 20 of us piled into the back of a transit van at the Windsor Castle on Castle Street. It was our preferred mode of transport due to the cost and the fact we could turn up under the radar. With the extreme heat and the crowded conditions in the van we probably drank a bit more than we should have. By the time we got to Newport we were already pretty messy.
It was also normal practice for us to go into the home end and we did just that, although there was very little in the way of segregation in those days anyway. There had been a few minor scuffles, with the police forming a line between the two sets of supporters. We were basically just singing at each other until we gave them a rendition of ‘After the Turn of the Century’. I could see this overweight plod looking at me, so I stopped singing at the swearing bit (you know… “and they ran like **** down Castle Street”) but it didn’t make any difference - he came over and grabbed me anyway, told me he was a lay preacher and he didn’t like that sort of thing. I told him I hadn’t sworn because I could see him watching me. His response? “I’m nicking you for being a smart arse then.”
I was put in a boiling hot shed inside the ground where my wrists were fastened to some metal rings on the wall using those nylon ties that tighten if you move. Not long after I was joined by three other County fans and a Newport fan. As I was being nicked and taken away, it left a gap in the police line, which led to it kicking off again and these four had been involved. The three County fans were mates of mine - Paul (RIP), Frank and Wilksy - and the Newport fan was Gary Cooper. I thought that had to be false but it actually was his name. Gary Cooper was a famous Hollywood star just in case any young people have stumbled across this.
After the match we were taken to the police station and charged. We were all in the same cell, and as we didn’t know the time, someone decided to flush the bog to see if the cistern filled up again. If it did, we knew it was before 7pm (I explained earlier the water was turned off at 7pm). Anyway, it didn’t fill up, so it was after 7pm. That also led to much complaining about what if one of us needed to use it - thankfully no one did.
Around 10pm, after charging us all with various minor offences, they let us go. We were told by the chuckling desk sergeant (not a sergeant in charge of the chuckling desk, I don’t think they have those even in Wales) that the last train out of Newport had just left and we’d better start walking. He did give us one piece of advice: “If you’re going to thumb it, the quickest way to the motorway is down Corporation Road.” Part way down this notorious road, a bloke came out of a house party and started ranting at us. “Come on you English bastards!” How did he know? We hadn’t said a word. Anyway, a couple of his mates dragged him back inside and told us we’d be wise to keep moving.
Eventually we arrived at a petrol station on a dual carriageway and decided it was a good place to start hitchhiking, but first we had to get the evening football paper to check the results. Back in the day, you could buy the Football Pink on a Saturday, which had all the results and local reports from earlier in the day. For whatever reason they were always on coloured paper - ours was pink, hence the name, but other areas had different colours, like the Green ‘Un in Sheffield. Anyway, we bought the south Wales version (County had won 1-0!) from the petrol station and then split into twos, trying to hitch lifts from cars leaving there. It must have been well after midnight when the petrol station closed and the traffic totally disappeared. It was now starting to get very cold, so we all decided to bed down behind the petrol station.
It must have been around 3am when someone decided it was a good idea to wrap pages of the football paper around his head to keep warm. We all followed suit and when we rose at around 5 or 6am, we unwrapped our heads only to find that our faces were covered in newsprint. We managed to wipe the bulk of it off and got back to our hitchhiking. I think I got home about 2pm on the Sunday.
Not long after I received a letter from South Wales Magistrates’ Court saying if I plead guilty to swearing (not being a smart arse after all) I could pay a £15 fine without having to appear in court, or I could travel down there and plead my case. I accepted the fine rather than go all the way down there only to have a couple of coppers say they heard me swear. I mean, who were the magistrates going to believe?
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The 12 Days of (County) Christmas!
After beating Charlton in the second round of the FA Cup this week, I thought we’d stay with the same stage of the same competition for today’s festive memory. After winning at Rotherham in round one in 1993-94, County thrashed Halifax 5-1 at Edgeley Park in round two, to set up that memorable date with QPR. Enjoy the video!
Congratulations to Oliver Reeves, who won yesterday’s competition. There’s a handful of prizes we’re giving away today, which we’ll do live on Twitter at half-time in both World Cup games.
Make sure you subscribe to The Scarf My Father Wore to be in with a chance of winning!
Click here for further details, as well as the full range of items in our Christmas Gift Guide.
The only Christmas gift guide you need this year
16 sleeps to go! The Scarf My Father Wore have curated a beautiful Christmas gift guide this year, from independent businesses across the UK. Check the guide each day, with new items constantly being added. And don’t forget, we’re giving away every single item in our December prize giveaway, you just have to be a subscriber to win!
Matt Walker ‘eats’ the World Cup
🇶🇦 No 15 - Qatar (Chapati & Karak) 🇶🇦
“Enjoyed a cinnamon chapati and karak chai more than the hushed Knightsbridge atmosphere. The officious Chapati & Karak have a 30 minute maximum table time. But, in true World Cup style, we stayed for 10 minutes of added time.”
One of my favourite football books is Matt Walker’s Europe United, in which the author and Fulham fan spends a whole season taking in a game in all 55 UEFA countries. Well he’s back with another fun challenge, to experience Qatar 2022 in restaurants and bars across London which represent all 32 competing nations. Matt has kindly allowed me to use his photos and I’ll bring you one each day, giving you a tasty flavour of the World Cup, in more ways than one.
Today in SK
🐟 As it’s Friday, are you having a chippy tea tonight? If you are, head over to The Sea Shell on Derby Range in Heaton Moor. Take your County season ticket and receive 10% off your order. Open until 9pm. (Card payments only.)
🕵️♀️ A nail-biting thriller by the Queen of Crime! When a house party gathers at the seaside home of Lady Tressilian, Neville Strange finds himself caught between his old wife Audrey and his new girlfriend Kay. The atmosphere is tense, but little do the guests know that the party is about to come to a chilling end. When someone is found murdered they all become suspects. But who among them is a killer and will the wrong person be hanged for murder? The Agatha Christie classic Towards Zero probes the psychology of jealousy in the shadow of a savage and brutal murder. A party you don’t want to miss! Stockport Garrick Theatre, 7.30pm. Tickets £12.
Stockport photo of the day
Wellington Road North, Heaton Norris
The weather warnings are coming out this morning. Not looking good for Rochdale away tomorrow is it?
What a great story Vicar! I've read the short version on YB before but the full one is a treat! And I think I will be chuckling all day now at the thought of a Welsh Police Station Chuckling Desk!