Saturday 10 February 2024
NEXT HOME GAME: Crewe – Tuesday 13 February, 7.45pm
NEXT AWAY GAME: Grimsby – Today, 3pm
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Dear County fans, Stopfordians, Grimsby supporters, and anyone else from The Football Family joining us today, a very warm welcome to your Saturday edition of The Scarf My Father Wore.
In November 1900, County lost 5-1 on their first visit to Grimsby, during our debut season in the Football League. In fact, our first six trips to Blundell Park all ended in defeat. I turn 40 this year, and we’ve only won four times in Cleethorpes during my lifetime.
More often than not, we’ve endured a miserable time over in that part of Lincolnshire. We’ve lost on Christmas Day, Good Friday, and twice on New Year’s Day. We got beat 3-2 in the FA Cup despite being 2-1 up with a minute to go. Carlton Palmer and Antoni Sarcevic have both been sent off there. And I don’t think any of the 68 County fans in the away end will ever truly get over that 7-0 defeat on a Tuesday night in our first season in the Conference.
However, all of the above is pointless in terms of today’s build-up, because just like Doncaster a fortnight ago, I’m saying County are definitely bringing all three points home this afternoon. Ian Brown, Ed Chadwick and Jonathan Baker all agree with me, too!
Today’s edition is sponsored by Elliot Dodd – Independent Celebrant. A big thank you to Elliott, who’s also a big County fan! He works as an independent celebrant, officiating services and ceremonies across Greater Manchester and beyond. If you’d like to discuss his services in more detail, call 07930 861025 or email info@elliotdodd-independentcelebrant.co.uk.
Finally, I’m currently walking every street in Stockport to raise money for mental health charity Mentell. If you’d like to make a donation to help me reach my target, please click here.
Total distance so far: 83.07 miles
Total steps so far: 142,594
Total raised so far: £1,352
Total completed streets so far: 123 (Click here for the full list, which includes reports and photos from every day of the walk.)
Further information on the walk can be found by clicking here.
Des Junior
Des Junior loves writing about County. But he can never be arsed doing match previews. They’re a bit dull, aren’t they? Paddy Madden’s out for two games with an ingrown toenail…blah blah blah…tomorrow’s referee has handed out more cards than Moonpig…blah blah blah…County haven’t won at Birmingham since 1672.
Fortunately, he has a number of fellow County content creators to call upon. Here’s their thoughts, general chit-chat and score predictions, as County go in search of a first victory at Blundell Park since August 2012.
Ian Brown, hedgegrower
Grimsby 0 County 2
We’ve only won one of our last five games at Blundell Park, a run which includes that horrific 7-0 defeat in the Conference. How does Challinor break the Cleethorpes curse today?
I would expect Challinor to approach this game as he would any other away from Edgeley Park, setting the team up to win the game as a first priority – not an unreasonable position to take in my view looking at the current form of both teams.
Looking wider, as far as County performing at their best at Blundell Park, is there a curse? Based on the history of games twixt us and them, I don’t think there is.
Since 2003-04, we’ve played at Blundell Park on eight occasions, losing only twice (the last two). Of course, the 7-0 loss in 2011-12 was a dire moment in our history of encounters with Grimsby, but we did actually win our game in Cleethorpes the following season!
So, no curse then, but if the doubters persist, in an attempt to be helpful, I would point them in the direction of Danielle Blinka, who offers remedies should curses be an issue. Amongst the recommendations is “taking a salt bath” – soaking yourself for 30 or 40 minutes whilst saying a prayer.
If that sounds unlikely to succeed, she suggests “smudging yourself”, but whilst that might sound interesting, it turns out to involve first waving a ‘selenite wand’ over your person before lighting a ‘sage bundle’ and blowing it out, allowing the smoke to waft over your body.
As you would expect, Amazon stock such an item, and just in case, I have sent off an order for a bundle but I fear too late for it to arrive for today’s game!
So there’s lots for Challinor to contemplate, and I hope I have been of some assistance to him in this respect, but I think he will have already plotted a course sufficient to see us through today to a 2-0 win – with or without a sage bundle!
Ed Chadwick, Stockport County Supporters Co-operative
Grimsby 0 County 2
You said hello to our readers for the first time last weekend with a brief introduction about yourself. Now… it’s time to get really up close and personal. As we’re heading to Grimsby today, what’s your usual order when you’re at the chippy?
I wasn't going to treat your readers to as much of my award-nominated prose as last week because I'm supposed to be earning a living (or designing the Co-op's new website) when I'm hunched over my keyboard. However, I'm a huge fan of chip shops and the allure of malt vinegar mixed with hot fat stirs something deeply romantic in my soul.
We all have our vices don't we? I'm told a certain breed of seedy men flock to Europe's fleshpots to gawp through windows at women bathed in red light. My equivalent weakness is a piece of battered cod lying seductively under an orange heat lamp in a stainless steel cabinet, the sodium glow amplifying the radiance of its golden batter, practically begging me to spear it with a wooden fork.
It will come as no surprise that I had what I'll refer to as "chippy tits" for much of my 20s and 30s – but at least I'll never suffer the indignity of sitting in a clinic waiting room avoiding eye contact with those other deviants I mentioned a moment ago.
Let's get some things straight: the best chip shops fulfil the following criteria:
Everything is fried in beef dripping
The roly-poly red-cheeked staff are all over the age of 40 and wear white knee length coats
It must not do anything heathen like opening on a Sunday or selling doner meat (I do like it but it doesn’t belong in a chip shop)
If it's dinner time, I will be ordering a steak and kidney pudding, chips and peas and a can of Vimto. For tea, swap the pudding for a fish and the Vimto for a cup of tea brewed in a pot and served the colour of the viaduct.
In the event I'm eating this at home rather than sitting in my car, windows steamed up like a dogger, I also like to get a potato scallop to eat as I drive with one eye on the road and the steering wheel slipping perilously through my greasy hands.
On to the football then. If I keep predicting 2-0, I'll be correct at some point. This is likely to be the easiest game of a tricky little run so I pray we can get an early goal and settle into a nice rhythm that sets the tone for Crewe on Tuesday. Six points in four days would give us some real momentum.
I can't remember feeling as disappointed about an injury as I do regarding Southam-Hales' latest setback. Hopefully the new lad on loan from Port Vale can cheer us all up. Other than that, I'd be sticking with the same side.
Jonathan Baker aka Geordie Hatter, The County Away Day Show
Grimsby 1 County 2
We’re playing the Mariners today. Let’s have your top five fish/fishing related playlist!
5) “Dance Ti Thy Daddy” by Margarette Ashton
Possibly (after “The Blaydon Races” of course) still the second-most famous North-Eastern traditional folk song within the shared cultural mindbank of the nation, thanks to its headline slot as theme tune to the hit 1970s TV serial When the Boat Comes In starring James Bolam. The title of the show was inspired by the lyric from the song.
This one takes me straight back to my living room in Fenham, Newcastle-upon-Tyne, during that era of transition from black and white to colour TV – and I’m having fish fingers for my tea, quite possibly followed by Angel Delight. I think Z Cars might be coming on afterwards, so when I’m going to get my homework done I’ve frankly no idea.
4) “Fishing” by Sports Team
I really like the no-nonsense pop sensibility of these guys – you just want to get up and dance to any one of their three-minute bursts of banging melody – but I suspect a close listen to the merrily shouted lyric may reveal a certain sardonic and even sociological melancholy, possibly touching on the decline of the trawling industry off the Eastern Seaboard. I can’t be sure, as to be honest I’ve only just discovered this particular number and am just two minutes in. But it is most definitely earmarked for further exploration.
3) “(Sittin’ On) The Dock of the Bay” by Otis Redding
I’m listening to this one now, and to be perfectly honest, we’re fully halfway through already and Otis hasn’t as much as got his rod out. I actually think he may be altogether intent here on just sitting on the dock of the bay wasting time. I’m sure he could catch himself something for his chippy tea if he put his mind to it however, and the classic ditty certainly has the feel of a lazy Sunday spent angling for haddock about it, so it’s going in.
2) “Only (A Prawn in Whitby)” by Cud
This lot were I think possibly from Leeds, and specialised during their brief late 80s pomp in bizarre lyrical odysseys set to a rumbling indie-grunge baseline. This one, like all of their finest work, has a vaguely unsettling but irresistable kind of air to it. Like a side of baked beans with your cod and chips, it shouldn’t really work – it shouldn’t really be allowed – but they somehow pull it off.
1) “Grafting Haddock in the George” by Half Man Half Biscuit
I mean, there can be no competition with this veritable masterpiece from Birkenhead’s finest. Again I can’t be completely sure it’s about fishing, but it’s certainly set in the back room of a pub and contains surely the finest joke ever spoken within a pop song – actually for my money the finest joke in the history of jokes, and I’m not even joking. The three-liner in question is set in Knowsley Safari Park, features a monkey and a tin of custard, arrives upon us quite apropos of nothing at all at around three minutes in, and is worth the admission fee on its own. Just sit back and listen.
Click here to listen to Geordie Hatter’s latest playlist!
5 questions with Elliot Dodd
What was the best moment with your business in January?
Planning ahead for 2024 and booking in ceremonies at new venues I’ve never been to before, such as the Roman Lakes in Marple!
What’s your plans for the business this month?
To grow my online presence on both Facebook and Instagram.
What would you like to promote to our readers this month?
In terms of self promotion, feel free to head over to my Facebook and Instagram pages to find out more about the services I offer.
If I had to promote a message to The Scarf My Father Wore readers, it would be to keep going, no matter what obstacles cross your path.
As it’s Valentine’s Day this month, what’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done for someone?
This one has come from the boss… I proposed on Christmas Day in our matching pyjamas!
There’s loads more train strikes this month. How have they affected you over the last few weeks?
Luckily I travel by car to my services, although I totally appreciate the frustration of the train strikes. My view is that we all need to stand together for better pay and treatment, and if that’s what it takes to get the message across, then unfortunately so be it.
Photo of the day
Blundell Park, Cleethorpes
County fans in the away end on our last trip to Grimsby on New Year’s Day 2023.
Today in SK
🎬 Cinema
Four films at The Savoy Cinema (SK4) today. Migration (U) at 10.30am and 12.45pm, Mean Girls (12A) at 3pm, All Of Us Strangers (15) at 5.30pm, and Dune (12A) at 8pm. Click here for tickets.
💿 DJ
Stockport’s biggest party at the weekend is at Bask (SK1), with DJ Gareth Brooks playing till 3am. Last entry 1.30am.
🌭 Food and drink
Treat yourself to the February special from Enigma (SK1). Just £5 for a hot dog with grilled onions, ketchup and mustard, skin-on fries, and any ground bean coffee. 12pm - 10pm.
It’s Monsters Weekend at The Petersgate Tap(SK1). A collaboration with Torrside Brewing, with eight beers available to try which are all 9% or over.
🎤 Karaoke
The Nelson Tavern (SK1) with Lee. From 8pm.
🎸 Live music
Dr Uke at The Dog & Partridge (SK2). 8.30pm.
Select Committee at The Flying Coach (SK7). 9pm.
Random County fan of the day #41 – Phil Robbie!
One final thing before you go… if you’re looking for a Valentine’s Day gift this month, how about a painting, or a cake, or a bottle of gin, or anything else from our fantastic sponsors!
🎨 Art & Gifts: Kate O’Brien Art
💈 Barber: STUDIO26 Haircare
🪟 Blinds & Shutters: Bauhaus Blinds & Shutters
📚 Bookkeeping: Eleven Accounts Services Ltd
🍰 Cake Maker: Claire Green Bespoke Cakes and Catering
🧽 Car Valeting: Rub A Dubz Detailing Ltd
🧼 Carpet Cleaning: Pro Clean Carpet Services
🏠 Carpets & Flooring: Kingsway Carpets & Rugs Ltd
🐈⬛ Cat Sitting: The Crazy Cat Ladies Cheshire
👶 Child Health: The Sleep Nanny
🤹♀️ Children’s Entertainment: Stockport Hero Hire
🧹 Cleaning: Beespoke Cleaning
🚙 Coatings: Colourtone Ltd
🦮 Dog Training: Paws High Peak Dog Training
🚘 Driving School: CFN School of Motoring
💷 Financial Services: The Mortgage Mill
🔥 Fire Protection: Radial Fire And Security Limited
🍸 Gin: Hatters Gin
🛁 Grout Refresh & Recolour: GroutGleam Stockport
💇♀️ Hairdressing: C West Hairstylist
🛠 Home Improvements: Menzies Develop & Build
💻 IT Services: Bridge Computer Services
🪚 Joinery: SAW Contracts Ltd
👨🍳 Kitchen Appliances: SW Appliances
🔑 Locksmith: APL Locksmiths Ltd
🚐 Minibus Hire: Westfield Minibuses
🧤 Oven Cleaning: That Oven Girl
🖌 Painter & Decorator: BGM Decorators
🧱 Plasterer: Tate Plastering Services
🚰 Plumber: GTG Gary the Gasman
📕 Publishing: Victor Publishing
🛖 Roofing: ADM Roofing Services Ltd
☀️ Solar Panels: Malbern Solar Ltd
⚽️ Sports Coaching: UK Sports Coaching Ltd
🖊 Tattooist: Heatons Tattoo Club
🪵 Timber Supplies: Portwood Timber Division of Illingworth Ingham (Manchester) Ltd
☀️ Travel Agent: PTF Travel Ltd
👨💻 Web Design: SITEZO
⚖️ Weight Loss: Slimming World Reddish & Bredbury with Shlean
🪟 Window Cleaner: R ‘N’ B Window Cleaning
🏋️♀️ Women’s Fitness: Sophie Pavey Fitness
🧘♀️ Yoga: Greenshoots Yoga
Some sterling work here from my fellow predictors! Off now to smudge myself in beef fat for the afternoon, that should lift the (possible) curse if anything will! You can all thank me for the three points later.