I saw (C)ounty lift a Football League championship trophy for the first time in my life
Des Junior puts pen to paper on a historic day of celebration in Stockport
Thursday 2 May 2024 – CHAMPIONS FORTNIGHT!
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Dear County fans, Stopfordians, and anyone else from The Football Family joining us today, a very warm welcome to CHAMPIONS FORTNIGHT on The Scarf My Father Wore.
It’s not every day Stockport County win a Football League title – in fact, the last time it happened was 57 years ago – so we’re shouting our success from the rooftops, with 14 champion-flavoured articles over 14 days. For this latest feature, please allow me to take you back to the Accrington game, with 1,728 words I’ve cobbled together on the day County got their hands on that beautiful League Two championship trophy.
Today’s edition is sponsored by Beespoke Cleaning. A big thank you to Vicky.
Finally, I’m currently walking every street in Stockport to raise money for mental health charity Mentell. If you’d like to make a donation to help me reach my target, please click here.
Total distance so far: 136.36 miles
Total steps so far: 217,174
Total raised so far: £1,666
Total completed streets so far: 271 (Click here for the full list, which includes reports and photos from every day of the walk.)
Further information on the walk can be found by clicking here.
Des Junior
I’m suffering from a writing condition. It’s not writer’s block. I’ve got plenty of ideas, I just don’t know where to start. I close my eyes for inspiration, but if anything, that makes it worse. One minute I’m stood with my best mates on the hallowed turf of Edgeley Park holding a Sky Bet League Two Champions 2023-24 flag, the next I’m in Bask watching (an injured) Tanto Olaofe standing on a chair whipping the crowd into a frenzy when the DJ sticks “Freed From Desire” on (or “Tanto’s On Fire” whenever that song’s played in Stockport). One minute it’s half-time at the County Courtyard and I’m jumping and bouncing and singing along to “Weekend In Paradise” by Jamie Webster, the next it’s midnight in The Wellington and I’m chuckling to myself watching County’s life president Steve Cree clinging onto a table doing his best not to regurgitate the Jägerbomb he’s just necked.
I’m also still trying to process the image of a naked Gary Megson enjoying himself in the Cheadle End.
Saturday 20 April – the day County lifted their first Football League championship trophy since 1967 – was unbelievably special, from start to finish. I honestly don’t know where to begin, so while my brain attempts to bring some organisation and structure to the photos and the memories and the conversations and the emotions and the moment I kissed another man on the cheek, let’s begin with a little bit of context as to why the weekend before last was so wonderful.
For that, we have to go back to the night of Tuesday 29 November 2011 – the night County lost 7-0 at Grimsby Town in the Conference. A grand total of 68 were in the away end at Blundell Park that evening. Me and Cashy the groundsman were two of them. County were 5-0 down at half-time, 7-0 down just past the hour, and without any exaggeration whatsoever, I genuinely thought we were about to concede double figures. In my four decades supporting County, that’s my nadir. Grimsby looked like they were going to score every time they entered our half. It was horrific. That was only County’s 23rd non-league fixture; we’d have to face a further 446 before making it back to the Football League.
Other Hatters will share their own horror stories with you. Losing 4-0 at Kidderminster to suffer relegation to the sixth tier. Exiting the FA Trophy at home to Rushall Olympic. Watching us get battered at Edgeley Park by the likes of Stalybridge and AFC Fylde. Cashy opted for our 2-1 defeat at Vauxhall Motors on a Tuesday night in September 2013: “I remember they scored the winner in injury time and the only noise was their players celebrating as there was barely a Vauxhall fan in the ground.”
Grimsby’s mine. Cashy’s is Vauxhall Motors. There’s a depressingly long list of other contenders as well from our eleven seasons in non-league: 6-1 at Alfreton, 5-0 at Southport, 4-0 at Boston, or any number of league defeats at places you’d only ever expect to see County in a pre-season friendly, such as Chorley, Altrincham and FC United.
The reason I’ve started such a positive article with such negative vibes is that my overriding takeaway from the day of the trophy lift is seeing the utter joy and elation in the faces of those Hatters who suffered the defeats at Histon and Hednesford, the Boxing Day blips against Barrow and Hyde, the miserable Tuesday nights returning from places like Guiseley and Chorley empty-handed.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled to see my mates’ kids and the rest of the next generation loving life at Edgeley Park at the moment – even though I find it hard to comprehend some of our young Hatters will have celebrated three league titles before they’ve even left primary school! Likewise, it’s lovely seeing our new supporters enjoying instant promotions (and yes, we’re building the fanbase through success, but so have Wrexham and Brentford and Cardiff and Bournemouth and Swansea and numerous others over the years).
But as I stand in Bask on Saturday night, taking in my surroundings and trying to capture the atmosphere as best I can, I observe the faces of lifelong County fans having the time of their lives and it’s the most heartwarming part of the day for me. It’s not just about the couple of hundred or so in Bask, but the old blokes who still went to every non-league away game on the Fingerpost Flyer, the mums and dads who took their kids to watch County at Gainsborough and North Ferriby, the groups of mates who still congregated at Stockport station with crates of beer every other Saturday but for shittier versions of previous away days: Oxford City instead of Oxford United, Bradford Park Avenue instead of Bradford City. This season has been for them. A Football League title feels like a real reward for the thousands of pounds spent and the thousands of miles travelled during eleven years in the non-league wilderness.
My Saturday starts with just as many smiles as it ends. The Armoury is my first port of call, which has been decorated with blue and white balloons and streamers and congratulatory messages. There’s no Johnny-Come-Latelies in here. I see original shirts all around me which were purchased over 30 years ago; various County friendships even older than that. Once again, I’m just so made up for all the regulars in this place, who thoroughly deserve a day like today. I’m reminded of an article I wrote a year ago, on the day of the Salford play-off semi-final second leg.
County could be bottom of the North West Counties League, losing 5-0 every week, yet these same faces would still be in The Armoury before every home game. How could anyone not find that comforting? In an ever-changing modern world – which seems to be disintegrating more and more with every video of a YouTuber terrorising an innocent member of the public for views, with every Piers Morgan rant on Twitter, with every unnerving development in artificial intelligence – this little pub on a roundabout in Shaw Heath is a sanctuary from all the nonsense. The world outside seems to move at a million miles an hour, but within these four walls, life moves at a slower pace. (And not just because more and more of the pub’s ageing patrons are waiting on hip replacements.)
The celebrations continue at Edgeley Park. There’s blue wigs, kids with inflatable trophies, County shirts with CHAMPIONS 24 printed on the back, and the odd bucket hat or two having a cheeky dig at our friends from North Wales. I’m loving every single second of today, I really am.
At half-time, the County Courtyard resembles something more like Glastonbury than a place to grab a quick pie and a pint. The party’s in full swing with County fans stood on benches and tables singing and dancing to feel-good summer anthems. I don’t even realise the second half has kicked off. Nor anyone else. There’s a screen with the game on, but apart from a few kids, nobody’s arsed one bit. Today’s about celebrating the 90-odd points from an incredible title-winning season rather than the 90-odd minutes of the dead rubber on the pitch.
For the history books, however, let it be recorded that Dave Challinor and his men are professional to the end. Despite clinching the League Two title four days ago, meaning there’s nothing riding on today’s result whatsoever, County are still determined to put on a show for the 10,120 crowd, and score a quartet of champions-esque goals. Cherries. Icing. Cake. Credit also to Accrington who aren’t simply in town to make up the numbers, scoring a couple themselves. It’s actually a rather entertaining game for an end-of-season contest that neither side needs to win.
I spend most of the second half taking photos and chatting to fans, such as Ian Lancashire, one of the few Cheadle Enders who also saw County’s last Football League title success in 1967. Lancs is 74, which means he was only 17 the last time something like this happened at Edgeley Park. Looking pretty in pink, Lancs regales me with memories of his 1966-67 heroes such as Matt Woods, Len Allchurch and Eddie Stuart. I’ll do the same with Brett Angell, Alun Armstrong and Mike Flynn if you ever speak to me about that unforgettable 1996-97 promotion-winning campaign. And in years to come, kids from today will share tales of Ben Hinchliffe’s saves, Fraser Horsfall’s tackles and Paddy Madden’s goals. Stories and scarves are passed down the generations.
The final whistle blows, and with County fans staying off the pitch (apart from one giddy kipper off the Pop Side, who’s quickly carted off with 10,000 fans chanting “wanker” at him), it’s time for the makeshift stage to be erected in the centre circle, along with all the CHAMPIONS paraphernalia and obligatory Sky Bet branding. Aside from the final block of the Pop Side (and even some Accy fans have stayed behind to watch), the players re-emerge to “Bring On The Champions” being belted out from all four sides of the ground. I think it’ll take the whole summer for it to finally sink in just how far we’ve come in such a short space of time – especially for the 3,317 who saw Boston United romp to a 4-1 victory at Edgeley Park on the opening day of our first ever campaign in the sixth tier.
After the trophy lift, with the crowds dispersed and the smoke cleared, it’s a wonderful feeling being able to share an emotional moment with some of my best friends on the award-winning Edgeley Park carpet. A special end to an unbelievably special season in SK3.
I do actually get writer’s block from time to time, when I’m working on other projects. That’s not been a problem when it comes to writing about County, however, which I imagine will continue to be the case well into next season. The likes of Huddersfield and Rotherham are coming to town, our juicy whatever-it-is with Wrexham will be continuing in the third tier, and there’s a first trip to Blackpool for twenty years. Come on EFL, hurry up and get these fixtures released. My pen’s just itching to hit that paper.
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Give Vicky a call on 07445 256191 or email info@beespokecleaning.com to check availability.
Photo of the day
How was this only five years ago?
Today in SK
🎬 Cinema
Two films at The Savoy Cinema (SK4) today. Back To Black (15) at 5.45pm, followed by Civil War (15) at 8.15pm. Click here for tickets.
🍺 Food and drink
If you find yourself in Stockport today, pop into The Petersgate Tap (SK1) for a pint or two. 12pm - 11pm.
🎶 Free jukebox
The Nelson Tavern (SK1). From 6.30pm.
100 random grounds that County have played at
#6 – Meadow Lane, Notts County
Last visit: Tuesday 16 April 2024. A night that will be forever etched in County’s history. The night we clinched a first Football League title for 57 years. And Dave Challinor’s men did it in style with a 5-2 win!
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That was Graham, by the way - Anne's my partner and computer owner. Somehow she puts up with if not exactly shares my passion for County!
Brilliant article, Des Jr. Lived through it all again with tears in my eyes, even though I'm a couple of thousand miles away from EP. And yes, I do remember the 66-7 season.
Calliope/The Costa del Sol Hatter