We’re all going on a League One tour, but what have Colchester made of 23-24…

The U’s were still in danger on the final day of the season, but Danny Cowley (and his brother) kept them in League Two

May 16, 2024

Thursday 16 May 2024

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Dear County fans, Stopfordians, Colchester supporters, and anyone else from The Football Family joining us today, a very warm welcome to your Thursday edition of The Scarf My Father Wore.

David Clayton joins us today as our 2023-24 season review continues with Colchester.

Today’s edition is sponsored by R ‘N’ B Window Cleaning. A big thank you to Pete and Tom.

Finally, I’m currently walking every street in Stockport to raise money for mental health charity Mentell. If you’d like to make a donation to help me reach my target, please click here.

Total distance so far: 148.94 miles

Total steps so far: 237,462

Total raised so far: £1,686

Total completed streets so far: 304 (Click here for the full list, which includes reports and photos from every day of the walk.)

Further information on the walk can be found by clicking here.

Des Junior

I don’t know if you’ve heard, but we’re all going on a League One tour! Are you going to give us a friendly wave off at the airport, or are you glad to see the back of us?

Glad to see the back of you, just because you’re such a standout team at this level. The three teams automatically promoted were always ahead of the pack, so I expect League Two to be more open next season.

Gareth Southgate needs a last minute replacement for his Euro 2024 squad. Which Colchester player deserves the nod based on their performances this season?

Undoubtedly, Arthur Read. We’re a completely different team when he plays. He was suspended for three games towards the end of Ben Garner’s time as manager and it may be argued that had he played, Garner would have been given far more time. He plays in central midfield and would certainly offer more than Henderson or Phillips… genuinely!

With World War 3 getting closer with each passing day, the government have asked me to pass on the following questions:

A) Who’s been your toughest player in 2023-24, most suitable to stick on the frontline?

B) What’s the best food you’ve had at a ground in 2023-24, that we can use for the troops in the trenches to keep morale up?

C) If World War 3 does kick off, how will Colchester fans react in a crisis?

A) One of our problems this season was our fragility, physically and mentally, so if you found yourself in our platoon, make sure your affairs are in order. This is borne out by who I’d consider our toughest player, Tom Dallison, being incapable of playing more than a few games without picking up an injury. Most fans like him, but this was the main reason he’s now been released.

B) Harrogate is on another level with food selections. Homemade pies, gourmet hot dogs, chilli nachos, all absolutely top quality. Honourable mention for the homemade sausage rolls at AFC Wimbledon as well.

C) Grim resignation that as soon as we get the managerial dream ticket we’ve wanted for years, of course the world ends.

Best moment of 2023-24?

Appointment of the Cowleys. Cannot be understated how much the mood of the club lifted from the moment they were announced and continues to grow.

Worst moment of 2023-24?

The final two games of the disastrous Matthew Etherington reign. An absolute battering at AFC Wimbledon (we lost 5-3 but it really could have been 10), then, finally, a home match against Gillingham. The mood at the club was so low that the supporters association did not put on the usual pre-match displays as it wasn’t appropriate. Later that week, the Cowleys were appointed and the clouds parted.

Funniest moment of 2023-24?

The final game against Crewe. Both teams needed a point to achieve very different aims. They made it 1-1 in the 93rd minute. The remaining three minutes involved three Crewe players having a nice relaxing rondo session, with each pass being cheered by both sets of fans. Our media team put together a cut of the footage alongside The Simpsons’ famous Kent Brockman commentary and it syncs up perfectly.

Four Four Two said you’d finish 15th. When Saturday Comes said you’d finish 22nd. You finished 22nd. Discuss.

I didn’t expect us to be as close to going down as we ultimately were, but I was always confident we’d be OK. I expect WSC did more of a deep dive into our signings and recognised that a large number of young players being loaned into an already very young squad was a huge risk.

A special night at Colchester in April, as County all but sealed promotion (Photo courtesy of Mike Petch)

County 2 Colchester 0 in November. Colchester 1 County 2 in April. Thoughts?

We had a couple of moments at your place – there’s not a day that goes by where I don’t think about what would’ve happened if Samson Tovide’s backheel from 12 yards hadn’t hit the bar – but you were comfortable winners.

The home game was for me, despite the loss, a sign that we were going to be OK. We played really well against the division’s best team and were worth at least a point. Fun fact: the penalty we were awarded was the sixth we’ve taken this season, and was the sixth we’ve missed. Fun.

Best and worst away days of 2023-24?

Best: Either Cowley’s first game at Swindon (last minute equaliser after being 2-0 down, a fanbase rejuvenated) or winning at Crawley in April (we’d dropped into the relegation zone and HAD to get something).

Worst: Forest Green. A 5-0 hammering against the worst side in the Football League.

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R ‘N’ B Window Cleaning have a brand new van on the road!

It’s lovely hearing positive news from our advertisers, so we’re delighted to say a big congratulations to Pete and Tom after recently launching their fifth van on the road.

The business is continuing to grow, and obviously a fifth van means they can take on lots of new customers. If you’d like to book a slot to have your windows cleaned every four or eight weeks, give the chaps a call on 07970 024993.

Visit rnbwindowcleaning.co.uk for further details.

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Photo of the day

The Dog & Partridge, Great Moor

Karen and the team at The Dog & Partridge, pictured with the League Two trophy at the weekend!

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Today in SK

🎬 Cinema

Two films at The Savoy Cinema (SK4) today. Challengers (15) at 5.45pm, followed by Back To Black (15) at 8.15pm. Click here for tickets.

🍺 Food and drink

If you find yourself in Stockport today, pop into The Petersgate Tap (SK1) for a pint or two. 12pm - 11pm.

Treat yourself to lunch at The Dog & Partridge (SK2). One course for £7, two courses for £11. 12pm - 2pm.

🎶 Free jukebox

The Nelson Tavern (SK1). From 6.30pm.

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100 random grounds that County have played at

#17 – Prenton Park, Tranmere

Last visit: A 4-0 defeat back in February. County were only a goal down at half-time, but it’s fair to say we were battered in the second half, with ex-Hatter Connor Jennings wrapping up the home side’s victory just for good measure. Dave Challinor’s men were still top of League Two after the horror show at Prenton Park, but it’s fair to say one or two supporters were starting to panic a little bit, especially just four days after Crewe had also turned us over. We needn’t have worried, however, as County went unbeaten in their next 13 to clinch the title in style.

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