Doncaster, Wimbledon, Colchester, Crewe, let’s have a catch-up with you… and Crawley too
Plus: Part 3 of Hannah Brown’s Spanish diary
Saturday 8 July 2023
NEXT HOME GAME: Huddersfield – Saturday 22 July, 3pm
NEXT AWAY GAME: Altrincham – Saturday 15 July, 3pm
Dear County fans, Stopfordians, and any Crawley supporters joining us today, a very warm welcome to your Saturday edition of The Scarf My Father Wore.
Back in February, Crawley picked up just 1 point from a possible 18 (including a 2-1 defeat at EP), finishing the month in the bottom two. But they beat relegation rivals Harrogate and Rochdale in March, before winning at Hartlepool in April. Taking maximum points against the shite around them just about kept them up, but will there be enough crap at the bottom of League Two for Crawley to finish above this season? Sky Bet don’t think so; they’re joint favourites with Harrogate for the drop. Our regular Crawley correspondent Dan Jones isn’t too confident either, with his club doing their summer shopping in “a charity shop”. (I won’t rub it in about the Nick Powell we’ve just picked up in Selfridges.) And with their weird crypto owners still struggling to win over the locals, Crawley could be in a spot of bother. This season will be their 13th in the Football League; that could prove unlucky for some in West Sussex.
As well as a load of stuff on Crawley, we’ve got Hannah Brown joining us once again today with the third instalment of “Postcards from Pinatar”. (Click here for part one, and here for part two.) It’s been a really popular feature on the website this week, so a big thank you to Hannah for sharing her Spanish tales with us. She’s flying back home today (on the same flight as the players) but I’m sure we can scrape enough money together for a new pen and a diary to keep Hannah on board for more of her adventures this season, even if Morecambe and Milton Keynes might not be quite as appealing as Murcia.
Finally, a big thanks to Matt from UK Sports Coaching, one of our brand new sponsors this month. With the summer holidays just around the corner, if you’re looking for things to do to keep your little ones entertained (reception to year eight), Matt’s company are running summer camps for six weeks during July and August at Hazel Grove Sports Centre. There’s three different weekly camps to choose from: football and goalkeeper wars, multi-sport, and dance. If you’d like more information, give Matt a call on 07891 205763 or email matt@uksportscoaching.co.uk.
Have a lovely weekend, and here’s to Nick Powell smashing home a 30-yard title-winning screamer at Wrexham 42 weeks today.
Des Junior
Our place: Saturday 2 September 2023, 3pm
Their place: Saturday 16 March 2024, 3pm
Last win at our place: Tuesday 14 February 2023, League Two, 2-1
Last win at their place: Never (played one, lost one)
Today’s Sky Bet title/promotion/relegation odds: Us – 6/1 11/8 50/1 Them – 100/1 18/1 10/3
Are you glad County lost the play-off final, or would you rather be playing Carlisle this season?
I’d rather County had gone up. I have a mate who I play darts with who’s a fan and I would have loved it for him, but if I’m being honest a not insignificant part of me also wanted County to win so I’d have the chance to visit The Griffin pub in Carlisle post-renovation as I felt robbed last season.
In terms of your summer transfer business, where have Crawley been shopping?
Probably a charity shop of some sort. We’ve brought in an eclectic assortment of players that may or may not function as advertised and are only united by the fact that the teams around us are happy to lose them for nothing.
With the current energy crisis, the government have ordered all Football League clubs to switch off one thing that uses power for the whole season. What are you choosing?
My energy bill could be double what it is and it would be worth every penny if our owners were denied access to the internet.
Which team do you most want to beat this season?
Morecambe. I don’t hold any particular grudge against them as a club but we play up there the weekend before my birthday so three points and a few pints in Lancaster would be a nice way to see it in.
County haven't played MK Dons since 2009-10, so we're a little out of the loop. What's your current thoughts when it comes to MK Dons away – boycott the game, happy to attend, or reluctantly go without spending any other money on food, drink, programmes etc.
Our relationship with MK Dons is slightly more complicated than most. I think most of our fans are naturally uneasy with how the club came to be, but we also have a rivalry with AFC Wimbledon stretching back to our 2010-11 Conference promotion season and some have taken that to the extreme of spitefully accepting MK Dons as the heir to the Wimbledon legacy. Personally I find that train of thought slightly ridiculous but generally speaking Crawley fans don’t tend to take as hard a stance on boycotting as many others might.
The Conservative party are in disarray at the moment. They've contacted your club and asked your chairman and manager to join them, to bring some new ideas to the table. Which roles would they be most suited to?
I wouldn’t trust Preston Johnson or any of his Web3 acolytes to run a bath never mind a governmental department, but given that he’s made a decent amount of money selling a worthless product maybe there’s hope for him as some sort of trade envoy.
Owing to a litany of injuries at the back end of last season, Scott Lindsey found himself having to get a tune out of players when they were either clearly unfit or ill-equipped for the position. That very much sounds like it would fit the remit of the Department for Work and Pensions.
There's a huge game at the Broadfield Stadium this season. You're 1-0 up with 15 minutes to go when Just Stop Oil protestors invade the pitch and get the game abandoned. How are Crawley fans reacting?
I don’t think there’s a great deal of environmentalist sentiment amongst our fanbase, but given the constant state of anxiety our team has had us in over the last year, I think a fair portion would just be glad of the chance to sneak off to the bar.
Newport County, Notts County, Stockport County. Snog one, marry one, avoid one.
Probably snog Newport. I enjoy binging on Tiny Rebel beer but wouldn’t want to spend any more time there than strictly necessary. Would probably marry Notts – I like Nottingham as a city and it’s nice to be able to visit it without having to go via the charmless shithole that is Mansfield. Guess that means I’m avoiding Stockport. Nothing personal; I’ll miss The Armoury.
Ryan Reynolds gets in touch and says he wants you to take him on a Hollywood-style night out when Wrexham visit. He wants the nicest meal in town, followed by the swankiest bar, and then the best hotel. What are your recommendations?
Weirdly enough, Crawley isn’t blessed with a huge excess of spots that could reasonably fall under the umbrella of “Hollywood-style”. The high street does have a pretty neat Thai restaurant and a pub called Brewery Shades that may not be aesthetically swanky but does have a decent selection of craft beer. The only hotel in Crawley I have first-hand experience of is the Travelodge, and it is definitely a Travelodge.
There's a quote saying "Stockport Isn't Shit" which has taken off around our town, with the words proudly displayed in bars and on various bags and t-shirts. What quote would you use to promote Crawley to people who think it's not that fashionable?
“That Town Next To Gatwick Airport.”
Which Crawley player is most likely to end up in League Two's team of the season?
If Nick Tsaroulla can keep himself fit for the whole season I believe that he has the quality to be an elite left-back at this level, otherwise it’ll be interesting to see if we can set up in a way that allows Dom Telford to rediscover his best form because when he has an effective foil he’s one of the most clinical finishers in the league.
Early predictions for 2023-24?
Champions – County. Promoted – Salford, Gillingham. Play-offs – Wrexham (P), MK Dons, Notts County, Colchester. Relegated – Sutton, Accrington.
(I can’t quite bring myself to relegate us just yet, give me a couple of weeks…)
Click on the links below to read the previous 2023-24 previews we’ve published so far.
Mansfield / Newport / Wimbledon
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Postcards from Pinatar
Day 4 - Friday 7 July
10.10am: Breakfast. Lots of sore heads and groaning.
10.35am: A Lincoln player in the lift asks us what a Mancunian is.
10.50am: Meet some Lincoln fans and offer to document their attendance in the absence of any media team or any reference to the game at all from their club.
11.00am: Lose all the Lincoln fans to the bar opening.
11.13am: Go all maternal on Dan Love who’s making sun cream application look like a massive endeavour. Jemma and I introduce him to sunscreen mist and it’s like some kind of fumigation situation.
11.45am: Daniel Pinchin, 7, takes on five Lincoln fans in the pool single-handedly, and wins, emptying the pool. “Lincoln get battered, everywhere they go…”
4.36pm: Arrive at the arena.
4.38pm: Spot first City shirt.
4.40pm: Get chips.
4.42pm: Spot second City shirt. What is going on?!
5.00pm: Name the trialist fun starts, including Ackeme Francis-Burrell named on the teamsheet, along with three of the trialist family.
7.00pm: The game finishes 1-1 with goals from Sarce and new Lincoln signing Alastair Smith. Despite the heat the sun was behind the stand and it was nowhere near as bad as expected. Queues for the bar at half-time made the Pop Side look quiet and meant that the County “end” was much quieter in the second half. County were definitely the stronger side in the first half, and all the trialists looked confident and fitted well into the game. County were unlucky not to score more with balls flying all around keeper Jensen, in a particularly garish shirt.
7.32pm: Make it back to the Vista Del Mar for round two but after learning from yesterday’s mistakes, order food. Find out that a group of County fans skipped out on their bill and everyone pitches in to cover it, plus some more, as it had been taken out of the staff’s wages. The waiter, Marcos, was incredibly touched; I think we’ve made a lifelong County fan of him.
11.02pm: Back to the hotel to find Lincoln fans sat with County.
12.30am: Back to the Pinatar Arena, which has been transformed into Pinatar’s premier nightclub. County fans back at the hotel send photos of drunk Lincoln fans lost in the corridors, who have made them their beds.
2.00am: Back to the hotel. And… sleep.
Today in SK
🥂 Food and drink
Lite bite meal deal at The Friary (SK3). Cod or haddock, served with chips, and a side of peas, curry or gravy. Plus tea or coffee. £9.95. 11.30am - 6.30pm.
Bottomless Saturday at TRUNK (SK7). Bottomless lunch £35 per person (includes 3 tapas dishes) from 12pm till 4pm. T&Cs apply and 90 minutes of selected bottomless drinks. Call 0161 222 9260 to book a table, and mention “The Scarf My Father Wore” to receive a 15% discount off the normal tapas menu.
🎤 Karaoke
Lee at Nelson Tavern (SK1). 8pm - 1am.
🎶 Live music
Rewired at The Dog and Partridge (SK2). Four old blokes playing songs from the 50s, 60s and 70s. 8pm.
Katie Jay at The Alexandra (SK3). 4pm.
The Scarf My Father Wore works closely with venues on a daily basis to bring you the most comprehensive guide to all of the best offers and events taking place across the whole SK region. Click on the links below for full details of everything taking place in your area over the next few weeks.
SK1 / SK2 / SK3 / SK4 / SK5 / SK6 / SK7 / SK8 / SK9 / SK10 / SK11 / SK12 / SK13 / SK14 / SK15 / SK16 / SK17 / SK22 / SK23
Photo of the day
Somewhere in Murcia
When you order Calvin Harris off Wish. Sorry, Steve!
Bunch of fives
5️⃣ of Nick Powell’s previous clubs
Crewe
Man United
Leicester
Wigan
Stoke
5️⃣ County pre-season destinations
Portugal
Ibiza
Denmark
Sweden
Isle of Man
5️⃣ Tuesday nights in 2023-24
Wednesday away
Bradford home
Forest Green home
Both games against Crewe
Salford away
5️⃣ players at this year’s Wimbledon who share their surnames with former Hatters
Andy Murray (Bob)
Venus Williams (Ashley)
Jordan Thompson (Peter)
Danielle Collins (Tom)
Heather Watson (Harry)
5️⃣ vegetarian brands
Quorn
Linda McCartney
Beyond Meat
This
Meatless Farm
A few Nick Powell belters to get us all in the mood
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Stayed in that hotel in January and will be probably staying again next January so hoping to find some concealed county stickers about the hotel.😁